The Color Red

I have two favorite colors: yellow and red. I fluctuate between which one I like more depending on my state of mind. Before I continue, let me define my version of “states of mind”.

For me, I have two states of mind. I have a good state and a bad state. Both of these states of mind encompass every possible emotion. Yes, that means that I can be angry in a good state and happy in a bad state. “How can this be? What kind of sorcery is this?” you ask. Here’s what it means: If I’m in a good state, I am able to shake off negative emotions far easier than not. I am able to see the logic behind why I’m feeling a certain way and I am able to find solutions. In a bad state, I am unable to do these things and become completely debilitated.

You could probably guess which state of mind favors red.

Red is the bad state of mind. Even though I can be happy and have a great time, my mind is unable to control how long that good attitude will last. On days like this, I will deliberately go out of my way to wear red, write with red pens, eat red-colored foods (cherries, apples, red velvet cake, etc.), and try to surround myself with as much red as possible. Again, it’s not that I’m angry or in a bad place, per say. But I’m not in control. Let’s examine that for a minute.

According to colormatters.com, red was symbolic of the primal forces. It represents passion, fury, life, and energy. It is a color of radical choices and behavior. When I’m in love with red, my impulse control is all but gone and I follow my instincts and my whims. Fun and dangerous, the color red represents a less-than-optimal use of my time.

I bring this up because over the last few days I’ve become less and less concerned with the important things and began chasing the things that make me feel good. I went on a real date for the first time since my last ex and I broke up. Had I had my whits about me, I feel like it would have gone a lot better, but I’ll spare you the details. My siblings and I were supposed to a special project for my mother, as Mother’s Day is just around the corner. However, none of my siblings were available for various reasons. Their excuses ranged from “I was going to see a movie with a friend” to “I’m working” and while these are okay reasons to not participate, I couldn’t help but feel abandoned to do the entire project alone. It wouldn’t have turned out nearly as good as I had hoped and it wouldn’t mean as much to my mom. So my rage consumed me. What do I do when I get angry? (Besides complain about it on the internet/to friends)

I change my hair! I shaved the sides and back of my head without really looking and because of that, it’s a bit uneven in the back. I then decided to do something I haven’t done in a long time…

Kinda subtle, right?
Kinda subtle, right?

I PUT RED IN IT. My Scarlet Stripe, my Crimson Coil, my Red Ripple. None of the hairstylists I’ve been do would do it for me, either because we were friends and they didn’t trust my idea of style, or because they didn’t trust themselves to do it right. SO I DID IT! Honestly, I love it. I think it’s really cool. Just a subtle little nod to my insanity for all the world to see.

This change in hair color represents a change in attitude. Whether I am a slave to my emotions or not, I will allow the best parts of the color red shine through; passion, determination, heroism, and life. No longer will the “bad state” be a bad thing. All things can teach you, can help you grow, if you know how to use them. Now I’m driven by the color red to accomplish my wonders. I can’t wait to show them all to you. I love you all, you beautiful people, you.

Thanks for reading. Remember: if you’re going to dream, dream BIG!

Filming in Flagstaff

I hate “jobs.” I hate all jobs. I’ve yet to work a job that I can earnestly say “I really like this and can see myself doing this for the rest of my life/for many years to come!” Nope. Not once. Every job I’ve ever had I go “Yup. This is what I know how to do and I do it well.” They’re boring, but that’s not the only reason I hate them.

Jobs are jobs. They give me no sense of accomplishment. I really really thought about it, but I cannot find a single thing it does that makes me feel like I’m doing something worthwhile. Paying bills, being responsible, that’s all wonderful. SO wonderful. But it’s not fulfilling. It’s surviving.

I’m not a survivor. I’m a dreamer.

Do not go gently into that good night! Don’t sit around! Do! DO!

Last weekend, I went up to Flagstaff to film some things for movie that I’m interning on. It was such an amazing experience. I learned more in one day than I did in my 4 months of shooting my own film. I helped take stills, dress the set, talk about shots with my director. What’s amazing was that he actually appreciated what I did, because I just realized as I was typing this that me suggesting things might have been totally been inappropriate for an intern. Urgh. Anxiety.

Regardless, I learned something about myself that day. I will get up at 4:30 with only two hours of sleep and will work my hardest, be professional, and be generally all sorts of awesome AND happy on a film set. Why? How?

It’s something I love. I truly, deeply love filmmaking. I’ve decided that I will find a way to make money doing this. I don’t care what I do, so long as it’s creating movies in some way, shape, or form. It’s what I was born to do.

If you guys have a dream, follow it. You will find happiness beyond your dreams.

TRIUMPHANT RETURN!

That’s right, you beautiful people, I’m back. I purchased a new power cable for my laptop and it just arrived today. I didn’t even think about taking pictures of it so that you guys wouldn’t have to stare at nothing but words. Boring, boring words. I apologize. Next time! Like maybe when I order a new computer. Or have pizza deliver. Ooo! Who thinks I should start taking selfies with all the pizza delivery people? That’d be pretty sweet. And weird.

I have so much to tell you guys and not enough space in one post. But here’s a list of things that will probably be coming pretty soon:

1. I went to Disneyland! You’re going to hear all about that for sure.

2. I went camping for the first time in at least 3 years! You have no idea how much I love camping because I forgot to tell you 

3. My sister got her Mission Call! It’s a pretty big deal for us.

4. I’m revamping the blog! I will more than likely be re-formating everything I can within the coming week and really focusing on what I want this blog to be.

5. I’m going to Flagstaff to shoot a trailer for a film I’m interning on! It’s a horror film and I’ll be sure to do my best to take as many pictures as I can when I’m not working.

6. I’m still addicted to goldfish! This is becoming a serious problem. Send help.

7. At least three other blog posts about my personal opinions of people on the internet! ….YAY!

8. YouTube! I’m revamping my YouTube channel in an attempt to be awesome and your support is most appreciated.

9. THE COLOR OF HUNGER UPDATE! Remember my short film I told you about? Well, so do I and we’ve got some cool news for you.

And much more! Stay tuned, my beautiful, wonderful, soulful readers. You’re the reason I came back. Love you much!

And remember: if you’re going to dream, dream BIG!

Temporary Break

I’ll be going on hiatus for a while. Just a few weeks. My laptop charger died and my finances are so stiff right now that I can’t be bothered to get a new one.

I’m happy to say that I am starting fresh. The world is changing and my excitement is bursting at the seams. I just had to let all of you wonderful readers know. Thanks again. Much love.

Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night: Interstellar

This post is important to me, so it has been written and edited over the course of several days. I hope you find it insightful and recommend you see the movie before reading this review as there will undoubtedly be spoilers. It’s not a review, per say. It’s more along the lines of “I’m spewing my thoughts and feelings about this movie onto my blog” kind of post.

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Whether or not Dylan Thomas meant it or not, to me, this poem that is repeated throughout the movie is about mankind’s drive to push forward and fight for survival. We, as a people are dreamers, explorers, and survivors. The world has thrown many challenges are way and we always find a way. Cooper, played by Matthew McConaughey, even says “We’ll find a way, Professor. We always have.” This is at least half the premise of this film. We watch as a father risks his life to find a way to save his family and “millions of other families” by leaving the world we call home in a desperate attempt to find another.

Far from home

The other half of the movie is about a father’s relationship with his daughter. Murphy (or “Murph”) is a very intelligent redheaded lass with a heart filled with love for her father, passion for understanding the universe, and strength when faced with the fate of the world. She stays on earth while Cooper and a team of scientists are sent on the last mission NASA can send into a wormhole to another solar system in another galaxy. Talk about long-distance. Cooper faces various challenges from personal betrayal to the laws of physics themselves. Time becomes his greatest enemy as it becomes relative when he approaches Gargantua.

The Heart of Darkness

The Devourer, a beast of tremendous ferocity, and one of the coolest things I’ve ever seen on the big screen; Gargantua is a representation of what a black hole would actually look like (with an accretion disk added to give perspective). It was a titan onscreen and it shook me when I first saw it. Could you imagine taking a wormhole to another galaxy to the only habitable worlds within range and discovering that they all orbit a black hole?! It blew my mind. I couldn’t have been more excited. This was when the film turned into more than just another movie. I felt that this was a masterpiece.

And I still do. Interstellar is able to present a captivating story, brilliant scientific theory, compelling characters, and the coolest robots you’ve ever seen into a single film. Flawlessly. However, after watching this movie again, I have to admit that the main reason it resonated so perfectly for me, was the score.

Mastery of Music

Hans Zimmer is one of my favorite composers. His work on Christopher Nolan’s Batman series and Disney’s Pirates of the Caribbean are some of my favorite soundtracks ever. When he revolutionized the film score industry with the iconic “Inception BWUAAAAAH!” I knew he was going to make something that truly struck a chord in my heart. The other soundtracks were great, but I felt like the emotional bond I wanted to have had not yet been formed. Until Interstellar.

I knew I would love this film, but I set that aside so I could have a fresh experience and be unbiased. Within the first five minutes my excitement was already back and overwhelmingly high. Every moment of the film, even the time Cooper was still on earth, was important and vital to understanding the characters and plot. There wasn’t a single moment out of place and I couldn’t believe how well it was put together. And then he goes into space. I got a little nervous about the robots, a little nervous about the wormhole, a little nervous about the planets and the black hole. And then, when he and the crew pass through the wormhole, my face froze in my excited smile face. I’ll take a picture of that next time it happens, as I can’t replicate it without the genuine experience. It’s pretty derpy.

Murph and Coop

I felt every emotion that I was hoping to feel and had a wonderful experience watching this film. Rewatching it, I felt the same thing. Nothing had diminished. I love this film and it’s a solid 10/10 on my scale. For those of you who don’t know, only 3 other movies out of the thousands I’ve seen have ever made it to 10/10. I’m very picky. This film will live forever in my heart and mind and I’m so grateful to have the experience of watching it.

We live in a time when movies are held back only by our imaginations and this film pushes us beyond anything we’ve seen before. We get to explore fantastic worlds, experience every human emotion, and walk away from this dreaming about our place in the universe. This movie made me feel small, but undeniably special. Humans are filled with potential and we are capable of great and terrible things. Christopher Nolan manages to show us all of this in a single film and I’m so happy that he did. (I plan on doing an entire post about Christopher Nolan soon, so keep checking back for updates.)

Thanks for reading, you guys. You’re all amazing. I hope you get a chance to look up at the sky and wonder about our place in the stars. Many blessings, all the joy, happy happy things for you. Etc.

Remember: if you’re going to dream, dream BIG!

Video of the Week: Doraleous and Associates

I’m going to pretend like this is a regular thing and who knows? Maybe it will become a regular thing.

For those of you who are not yet aware, I love YouTube. I think the idea of sharing videos with people is amazing thing and I love perusing the corridors of the World Wide Web Wilds in search of the things that make me happy. Chief among aforesaid things is my desire to laugh. My sense of humor is relatively stagnant, in that it doesn’t change as frequently as everything else in my life does, but lately I’ve been drawn to this kind of humor.

If you finished watching the episode (or skipped it to continue reading) instead of just leaving the page altogether, thank you. You and I can be friends.

-SPOILER ALERT-

My favorite character in this video (and throughout the show) is definitely the Lady of the Lake. Keeper of the mighty Zephyr Blade, the Lady of the Lake is a sarcastic Pond Woman with a pathological need to annoy people. You can imagine why I like her so much.

"Behold, DeLorean, the TRUE Zephyr Blade!"
“Behold, DeLorean, the TRUE Zephyr Blade!”

When asked, the Lady of the Lady will present adventurers and warriors from across the land with various objects (while claiming they are the true Zephyr Blade). She’s a sociopath who makes fun of the people who come to see her by sarcastically insulting their character or mispronouncing their names. She also sends people on ridiculous and life-threatening quests just for the fun of it. Probably bored with waiting for (possibly) thousands of years for the Chosen One to arrive and take the Zephyr Blade, or emotionally distanced because she’s tired of people coming to her and being disappointed in not receiving the magical blade of magicness, The Lady of Lake now seeks but one thing: entertainment.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this post, as well as Doraleous and Associates. May your day be a little better, the laughs a little heartier, and the may the Zephyr Blade be yours one day!

Dream big!

More To Come!

Again, sorry for the lack of posts. I have a couple ideas cooking in my noodle and hopefully they will be ready for publication soon. Wednesday (which is technically today) is the day my brother gets home from his Mission. There will be plenty of stories to tell about it later. I will talk about that, and Easter, my new job, the movie I’m interning on, and so on! I’m so excited, guys and gals. You’re all so incredibly wonderful and I can’t wait to share what’s been going on. Love you all!

Sleep well and dream big!

The Posts

When you run out of things to say, you must simply wait for more words to come. My absence from the blog has nothing to due with anxiety, fear, or lack of information to share with you all. On the contrary. Life has been amazing. I have new goals and plans and I’m growing and learning more about the world and about myself faster than I ever have before. I’m excited to share what I find with you. Brace yourselves.

This is the Year of the Tay! I’m going to rock it and own it and change my life into something so powerful and magnificent that it will shock all the other people like me into action. If I can do it, then you can too! We got this, guys and gals of the interwebs. We got this. Don’t forget: If you’re going to dream, dream BIG!

Fantasy Writing: Magic

The fantasy genre has many qualities about it that completely enthrall me. Among these qualities, one stands out above the rest: MAGIC.

Magic presents us with a variety of themes and feelings that thrill us. Mystical, mysterious, marvelous, and mischievous, magic presents us with a menagerie of majesty. Magic can create meaningful connections between characters, or unleash mayhem upon the world. It’s incredible. With a flick of a wand, spells can turn rats into water goblets. Muttering a binding can link one source of heat to another. Speaking the true name of something can give you power over it. Ingesting certain metals can give you special abilities. Magic presents us with the ability to do the impossible, while also giving us the burden of power. It’s a fantastic thing that brings a whole new level of complexity to a story.

So what about you? How do you use magic? Is it an elaborate system of do’s, don’ts, and rituals? Is it a simple, soft system or a complicated, hard magic? What is your favorite thing about magic? Comment below. I want to know.

ALSO, YOU SHOULD CHECK THIS OUT! I was made a moderator on this subreddit that’s devoted to magic systems. I’m trying to come up with new ideas for it. Right now, it’s just a place to post about your magic system, but I’m trying to figure out what else I can do with it. Magic-building activities or games, perhaps. Any ideas are appreciated. Go create a reddit account and post about your magic system. We want to hear about it! 😀

Love you all. Thanks for reading.

Together we will live forever.